Ephesians 1:9 Having made known unto us the mystery of his will, according to his good pleasure which he hath purposed in himself:

As I sat on the couch in my living room all sense of time and events escaped me. My children came to speak to me and I didn’t not know it. I was oblivious to all sights and sounds in the room. My wife asked me where I went when I finally came back to the present. I had no awareness of what had happened around me. I did however know what happened inside me.

The Holy Spirit took that time to take all the pieces of scripture that was on the floor of my mind and put them in order so that they formed the picture and it all fit together in order. I did nothing to sort out the mystery that was unfolded before me. It was God who enacted the ordering of His Word to allow me to make sense of it all.

In all my years I have not heard of anyone having a similar experience. If they have, I have not met them. It might have been God’s way of showing me that I needed more than just reading His Word. I was not in fellowship at this time. I worshipped alone. I had no pastor, no teacher, no fellowship and this was not God’s way. I needed the structure of an administration of God’s church body. I needed to be part of something more than just myself.

Luke 10ip Mary, which also sat at Jesus’ feet.

While Mary did the only needful thing, in hanging on every Word of Jesus, she did not sit there alone. That point is often lost on us because of the telling of Martha’s concerns for playing hostess and preparing food alone. She prepare it for many in her house while Mary was in fellowship with the many at the feet of Jesus.

Matthew 9:13ip learn what that meaneth

IP stands for In Part. I did not quote the whole of yesterday’s verse because I want to concentrate on relevant meaning. At the time of my repentance I knew I was sick, my heart wasn’t right and my mind wasn’t right, and my soul was in danger. I wanted out and turned to God for the answer. That was my answer to my problem for that moment.

At that moment I was only thinking about myself. I wasn’t thinking about the impact these changes would have on my family and friends. It was my problem and it didn’t concern me at the time that I had been their problem. I had to deal with me and my new creature in Christ before I could think about them.

Allow me to admit that I made mistakes in those early years because I didn’t know what my change meant to them. They were not my primary concern at the time. How could I explain to them what was happening in me if I didn’t even understand it myself. It was something akin to being in a coma, waking up and discovering everyone telling you that you aren’t the same man that fell asleep. Then who am I?

At the time it never occurred to me that my experience might be different than that of others. I struggled alone with my new identity with only the help of the Holy Spirit whom I was just discovering to be God in the third part. This issue of a triune God was still ahead of me. That did not stop the Holy Spirit in performance of His duties to enact the will of God. Praise God.

The closest I can explain my early bible studies was find bits and pieces of a puzzle. I gathered the pieces in my mind, in my warehouse of knowledge, but there was no connecting the pieces to form a picture. They were just scatters puzzle pieces on the floor of my mind. Then one Sunday afternoon the Holy Spirit took over.