Proverbs 15:1-4 English Standard Version
1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
2 The tongue of the wise commends knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour out folly.
3 The eyes of the Lord are in every place, keeping watch on the evil and the good.
4 A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
Galatians 5:22-23 English Standard Version
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.
A theologian once said to me that self-control is listed last because it is the last fruit of the spirit.
Fruit does not fall from the tree until the fruit has been ripened. Yes, I just made up my own one line parable, yet for me it does give me peace. This is the point that I would like to make.
Romans 14:19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.
What gives me peace may not lead to mutual upbuilding. I should be the first to admit that some of scripture is not easily understood. No, wait, Peter said that about Paul’s writings, so I am not first. At the end of my article called The Sect I said “The purpose has to be to seek God’s will or this will not work.”
How soon we forget because shortly after that I sought the scriptures to bring me peace of mind, I found it and yet that last fruit of the spirit, self-control, struggled. Wisdom seeks counsel and so I did. His counsel confirmed what I already knew in my heart, controversy leads to weakening of faith and does not lead to peace for others. Build up, do not burden.
A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit.
The book of wisdom comes through once again.