1 Corinthians 13:5c Love is not easily provoked

That doesn’t say love cannot be provoked, just that it isn’t easy. We are talking agape love being provoked. If we are going to compare apples to apples then we must not include those things which provoke us in the natural. Who we are in the natural is not God, nor God’s perfect love. When I lose it, it is not God who loses it and is not an agape love response. So let us be clear on what provokes agape love aside from what provokes us in the flesh, because we still have flesh.

The way I see it is that the abiding love of God in us is only provoked by our rebellion, not by anything that is happening to us externally. Would He prefer that we turn the other cheek? Yes. If we don’t He understands and goes to work correcting what needs to be corrected to elicit a better response.

There needs to be a serious self-examination of those things that easily provoke us. As my example, I am more aware of drivers around me and give place for people to cut me off in traffic because I know they will. They no longer provoke me because I know that road rage is a personal issue that only I can manage.

Are the things that provoke you within your control? Probably not since I have witnessed so many ugly responses on social media. It is so easy to be ugly there because it’s a computer screen you face and not a person. How much of that attitude gives place to bad actions in the real world? It makes it easier to be provoked in the real world if you cannot keep your emotions in check privately.

1 Corinthians 13:5b Love is not selfish

But that isn’t what the word says. The words are “seeketh not her own”. Paul’s use of the Greek word heautou is a reflective pronoun which is a genitive case (dative case or accusative case) and carries with it a need to assign gender. His or her matters not, it is the reflective nature of the word that causes us to look inward towards self rather than God’s attribute.

It is the only time within these descriptions of agape love that the genitive case is used. Perhaps that is because God is selfish, not in the sense that we are selfish but all you have to do is look to the first commandment to find a most singular selfish moment. You shall have no other gods before me. (Exodus 20:3)

God is selfish in this sense for our sake, that none should perish. (John 3:15) The use of the reflective pronoun is intended to make us examine our motives in selfishness. I love my wife, I do not want any other man to have her. That selfish moment is born of commitment and the oath we took towards each other. There are other moments within our relationship that are selfish by nature which are not born of commitment or oath.

We have agape love in us but the other types of love also reside alongside agape. Eros and phileo are still very much a part of our daily experience. Both of those types of love carry with them a certain amount of selfishness. An imbalance of selfishness in either type will ruin a relationship.

Philippians 4:5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.