I will not be quoting scripture today. Today will be about traditions and memories.

I will be joining my family at my daughter’s house later today to celebrate what has become our family tradition. We have a combined family Christmas Eve where we share our gifts to one another. Then tomorrow each of my children will break up into their respective families and celebrate Christmas morning and the day as they transition into traditions apart from my influence.

For many years my father and mother held a tradition of the eve of anticipation. Nothing was opened until Christmas morning. The first remembrance of opening presents on Christmas Eve happened in my tender pre-teen years. I was old enough to stay up later and celebrate some of the older experiences, but not all of them. I was sorely disappointed when I was told to go to bed earlier than I desired. I had expected to stay up later.

Begrudgingly and with many a moan I climbed the stairs to the room I shared with my older brother. When we turned on the lights we each found snow skis on our beds. This was our first Christmas Eve presents. Sorrow turned to joy and disappointment to gladness.

I was married for eight years before we had children so the issue of Christmas traditions did not come into play until the children were old enough to recognize the Christmas season. We had different backgrounds and experiences and it took some time before our blend of traditions took shape. Eventually our Christmas Eve tradition developed and Christmas day became more about sharing with friends and allowing the children to renew their excitement with our friend’s children.

Children get older and some traditions change because we evolve and what is important changes. Then when they marry and they find themselves blending into a new family of their own, they decide what and how to celebrate this season. This is as it should be and I am thankful for that and this day that includes me and what remains of my Eve Exchange.

Isaiah 59:4,9 None calleth for justice, nor any pleadeth for truth: they trust in vanity, and speak lies; they conceive mischief, and bring forth iniquity. Therefore is judgment far from us, neither doth justice overtake us: we wait for light, but behold obscurity; for brightness, but we walk in darkness.

I can only speak for myself and wonder if anyone else feels the way I did and do. Did was a boy without understanding, without light, who would not be subject to any man. Do is a man who loves the Lord walks in His glorious light and knowledge is found in seeking truth from He who is true.

What hasn’t changed is this ingrained sense of justice. Make no mistake, I am a sinner saved by grace and I have suffered the consequences of my sins. I have not been judged by man and none shall ever hear me confess my most heinous sins. My conscience is clean only by the blood of my Savior Jesus Christ.

I find conflict within my soul for the justice I love and the mercy I have been granted. I would have justice done but my Lord declares to me that I must render a righteous judgement. I am left with this overwhelming denial of the mercy shown to me because I cannot see enough goodness in the land.

Psalm 27:13 I had fainted, unless I had believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

He is here and His goodness does exist but that sense of justice within me cries out, “Not enough!” There is not enough goodness in the land and we all suffer because of it.

I cry out to a lost and dying world to seek God while it is still called today. Confess your need for the salvation offered thru Jesus Christ and yet I still feel “Not enough!”

His grace is sufficient for me, yet justice still cries out.