Hebrews 4:15 English Standard Version (ESV) For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin.

I took my counselor’s advice. If I didn’t feel like doing something, I didn’t do it.

What I discovered was that the Lord had given me a new heart and I discovered what I want to do. I want to love others as God loves me, unselfishly. I also discovered that it takes more than human effort. 

Romans 16:25-27 English Standard Version

Doxology

25 Now to him who is able to strengthen you according to my gospel and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery that was kept secret for long ages 26 but has now been disclosed and through the prophetic writings has been made known to all nations, according to the command of the eternal God, to bring about the obedience of faith— 27 to the only wise God be glory forevermore through Jesus Christ! Amen.

He has given us the strength to obey, but not just to obey but to know the mystery of His will.

Once again we must admit that loving others is going to create reciprocal efforts on the part of those we fellowship with together. Humans, with human weaknesses, who might not have experienced the intense feelings of agape love. That means that grace has to take a vital role in loving one another. Grace without wisdom can end up being used up, but that is why God has provided such an endless supply of grace.

In all this the Lord knows exactly how we feel about our human efforts. If anyone had a right to complain about being shunned for good works, our Lord knows better than any of us. They killed Him for it. Paul called it dying daily.

1 Corinthians 15:30-31 English Standard Version

30 Why are we in danger every hour? 31 I protest, brothers, by my pride in you, which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die every day!

1 John 4:8 English Standard Version (ESV) Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love.

The Greek language distinguishes four different kinds of love: Philia, Eros, Storge and Agape.

Philia is a friend’s love.

Eros is erotic love.

Storge is family love.

Agape is perfect love.

Which of these do we feel?

Who has a friend that is a lifelong friend? If you do, you are lucky. My best friend drowned in the Atlantic while I was serving my country. I cannot say we would have been lifelong friends, we never got the chance.

Erotic love has ruined many marriages. Chasing after passion is a fool’s game. Keep it up and you will end up alone with no passion in your life. I’ve seen it happen over and over again.

Storge love is very complicated. Family dynamics are complicated. Sibling rivalry is no joke and family members can cause us the greatest pain, or the closest bonds. There are always strong feelings in families and not always positive.

No one is perfect in love but God. Paul gave us the love chapter describing perfect love and when we look at how it acts we see ourselves coming up short in performance.

The interesting thing about all these different kinds of love is that they are a reciprocal force. You have to give love to receive love. If we do not put forth the effort we don’t feel love is returned.

1 Corinthians 13:8a English Standard Version (ESV) Love never ends. 

God’s perfect love never dies, never fades, never is lost and if we don’t feel it, that isn’t God’s fault.

We cannot love God perfectly. Agape love does not get returned to God as a reciprocal force. The Word of God does not say to love God perfectly but rather to make an honest effort. With all our strength has limits, we are human, make the effort and don’t condemn ourselves because we are not perfect.

A wise counselor once told me, “If you don’t feel like doing it, don’t.”